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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Sasuke 22 - Spoilerific Review - Part 2




Sasuke spoilerific review ;) Warning.. incoming blog of Sasuke 22.. if you don’t want to know.. you have been warned :D For a preview of this event.. Please see SASUKE NAVI Spring 2009 (1 hour review of Sasuke 22 with fluff pieces of all the major players in the upcoming Sasuke!) Oh.. and as Ube says: If you are from the G4 Forums, DON'T POST THIS THERE.


WHOOT! First All-Star sighting on the starting block! First Champion Kazuhiko Akiyama 秋山 和彦

Aww this is a cute picture with the Cherry blossoms :) LOL he's got a totally serious face.. I guess he did take me seriously about telling Sasuke "I'm going to make you my bitch.."

Fluff piece saying he was the first champion ever for Sasuke and that he is now 36 years old (cough.. not much younger than me.. cough)

Yep and I'm sure you can STILL bounce quarters off his abs..

Showing his problems since the win with his eye problem. This was the pwnage in Sasuke 17

And his last pwnage in Sasuke 20 - The Half Pipe Attack

Cool overhead shot of the course as they start their long introdution (and no I have no idea what his theme song is.. trust me .. we are trying to find it - Along with Bunpei Shiratori's)

Kazuhiko Akiyama 秋山 和彦 a former hairy crab fisherman from a tiny village off of Hokkaido, Japan. Currently he is a acupuncture therapist. (BTW for those who care.. his theme song is from the movie G.I. Jane. The track is titled The Scorpion's Mission)

... wtf is Nagano looking for in his pants?? or is it his shirt he has? Or his jacket? Wait.. Akiyama has his pants on.. what does Takeda have? Poor Shingo already looks lost..

Whatever it is he's trying to find.. Yamada is finding this funny. Takeda seems to be the only one paying attention to poor Akiyama while Nagano is searching.. and Shingo.. still clueless..

Rare to see this shot.. but it's cool :) Akiyama has no issues with the sextuple steps

Okay.. Circle Glider time... grabbing rope..

Eaaaaaaaaaaaaasy does it.. phew.. sqqqqqqqqqueaked to the other side

Okay.. the Jumping Spider.. he did well in 20 so let's hope he has this trampoline down.. after all he still has this at home..

Taking his time.. catching a breath.. (I am too...)

Heeeeeeeyaaaaaaaaah.. WHOOT.. squeaked on but he got it!

Okay.. he's fine on the spider wall

Okay.. next part.. this is where he went down in Sasuke 20

.. aaaaaaaaaand nooooooooooooooo he slipped? hang on did he slip?

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.. /cry....

These don't need captions.. Here's the reaction...

I feel your pain man.. I feel your pain :(

Run up was going good (see the guys right there to see it)

Everyone looking intently... he had a good head of steam going up there..

And right THERE he lost it.. just misjudged the plank and his foot slipped over the ledge

All that momentum just went straight down..

Nagano just noticed...

All the momentum just crashed right into the wall... no recovery time :(

And down he goes .... nooooooooooooo!!!

OH! so dissapointing :(

Aww but he does manage to smile.. I'm still crying..

(L-R) Kazuhiro Yasuda 安田和博 then Nochi ノッチ (both of Dangerous デンジャラス) and Manabu Kishi ! 岸学
Okay this picture looks hysterical.. especially with the waving gun.. it's just so not right it's funny.

Manabu Kishi ! 岸学 of Camp - He does a Jack Bauer impersonation

Death by Sextuple steps

Kazuhiro Yasuda 安田和博 of Dangerous デンジャラス (he was a Fast Forward - Death by Circle Hammer)

Nochi ノッチ of Dangerous デンジャラス He's best known as the guy who does the Barack Obama impersonation on Japanese TV... though.. why does Nochi remind me more of Gilbert Gottfried?

AAAAAand Death by Log Grip!

LOL earlier he was changing YES WE CAN and the announcer just said "NO YOU CAN'T"...

Okay.. I expect fanmail for this picture alone.. wait.. I didn't show her boobs.. Not enough fanservice for the fanboys.. anyway.. this is Rie Komiya 小宮理英 .. OH and for the LOVE OF EVERYTHING HOLY.. her name is not "RYE".. okay got that off my chest..stupid G4 announcer who butchers names... it's so not worth my time to figure out who the moron is.. moving on..

If anyone has seen her before.. it's because she was in Kunoichi before..

Where she and her boobs were on display.. er.. uhmm.. riding the pole.. wait that wasn't right either.. coming through the opening.. wait.. she almost beat the Final Stage in Kunoichi 5 on July, 2006?

Anyway.. didn't get a good picture of her with her name thing underneath.. the camera was making love to her and didn't keep still enough to get a clear shot.. this will have to do.. she's about to mount the log... grip.. obstacle..

The announcer must be saying racy jokes because she's laughing the whole time.. either way she's doing well and on her way to the Jumping Spider

Awww.. I hear the groan of every true male of the world.. including my husband.. /sigh.. Death by Jumping Spider

Oh and as an aside.. it's funny that they didn't show the All-Stars.. specifically Nagano sitting in the audience with his legs crossed like he did for that porn star (Shingo too...).. maybe the presence of Nagano's wife might have something to do with it.. they are trying to not get him killed.. good job TBS!!!

Ouch she didn't fall in the water.. she fell backwards into a strangely familiar position.. OKAY I'LL STOP WITH THE HOOKER JOKES... besides.. wait.. okay I'll stop.. she went off course so she is disqualified.. Awwww no wet shirt fanservice... snickers..

Sato Hiromichi and his grin can't believe what he is seeing.. I guess he's frustrated no one got to see her wet?? (P.S. She was in Muscle Musical around the same time as him so that's how they know each other)

Okay that's as good as it gets.. and her cleavage is there.. post your fan mail below :D

and UNLIKE a certain AOTS host.. she knows she is disqualified and leaves gracefully... okay digressing.. moving on.. (P.S. Edited this in from Ube's blog: I think if you touch the ramp under the trampoline you are out. That's why Rie couldn't go on (in case you were wondering).)

Tomoyo Haga 芳賀友也 - Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル

Tomoyo's known to get pretty far in the course.. here we go.. Slider Jimp time! Can he be the first to clear it?

Gaaaaaaah again.. no.. he let go too early from the pole and didn't get that far over to grab the rope. with any strength. when he did his grip gave way

The interested 3 again.. Shingo, Toshihiro and Makoto pacing in the background..

LOL they always look back to see his reaction.. classic! Nagano is looking pretty freaked right now...

He left the pole with a lot of speed and in perfect position.. not flying sideways or in jerky movements..

Maybe TOO much speed? Not sure.. but he tries to grab on to the net

He grabs on but the momentum rips his hands off the ropes and down he goes

He's so frustrated... poor thing.. Tell you one thing though.. the MM kids are looking great out there today!

Toshiaki Kasuga 春日 俊彰 from Comedy duo Audrey オードリー I've seen at least 2 commercials with him already...

Death by Swandive off the Sextuple Steps

He's already dropping off and decides to milk his death by doing a swandive backwards from this position.. Crowd loved it

Great to see Luci Romberg!.. but wait.. I thought Shingo was 31? I see they are futzing with numbers the way G4 does.. oh well throw out your books.. here comes Luci!!

If you remember her from Sasuke 21 - there she became the first woman to clear the Jumping Spider!

Here is the 2009 edition waiting for her!

ANC 3 winner Luci Romberg - This is the best picture I could get for her.. the camera was swinging wildly..

She gets ready to take on the Jumping spider

Gaaaaaaaaaaaah.. not enough height??

Gaaaaaaaaah down she goes! Awwwwwwwww

Daisuke Miyazaki is not at all happy.. he was hoping she did it again

Awwww I was hoping she got her revenge on the Half Pipe Attack!

Perfectly centered..

Yeah .. not enough height.. she tried to muscle through.. good for her!

And straight down.. oh that sucks :(

Aww she is totally dissapointed

She's dissapointed

Hiroyo Shimada 島田裕代 - Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル

Showing she was a former gymnast

Wow she is at the Jumping Spider as well!

Aaaaaaaaaaaand SHE DID IT!

Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル members are freaking out! I lost track how many are here but they are having a great tournament

Okay back to the spider walk portion.. she's going through it

Here's her try at the Half-Pipe attack. The same obstacle that took out Luci Romberg last year!

And it pwns Hiroyo this year!

LOL Dramatic shot of the pwnage.. So she and Luci are officially tied

Daisuke Miyazaki likes to cheer on chicks.. gotcha :)

.. while that's going on.. OMG.. is she.. OMG she's drowning!!!!!! She can't swim!!

Luckily they are monitored and JUST as she goes under they throw her a life preserver thingie

Wow and jumped in after her.. Good job!!

Okay she's okay.. phew.. she's okay.. that was scary!

Aww she's frustrated.. Luci feels your pain!

Kiichi Ishikawa 石川 輝一 - Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル

.. HE CLEARED THE SLIDER JUMP!!! With no problems either!! Aaaaaaand.. we go to commercials.. groan...

Back from commercials.. gaaaaaaaaaaah he's getting stuck on the ropes.. oh yeah.. I remember the Jumping Spider now..

Wow his time evaporated!! Well.. at least he gets a shot at the Rope Climb.. the last obstacle..

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah... didn't think so.. but yeah.. he timed out.. Valiant effort though!

LOL Nagano and Takeda are merciless!! They see it in slow motion in his head.. especially Takeda...

They are eville I tell you...

GONG!!! Time UP.. u... Doesn't it look like Takeda is about to curse.. In ENGLISH? Don't.. read.. lips..

LOL Nagano is about to throw out his back folks.. LOL

He's now coming up for air.. wow they are MEAN! They will LAUGH at your demise!

Okay okay.. Nagano starts to clap for him.. Takeda too.. they loved the show

.. they are still giggling..

.. hmm.. mental note.. check this thing out.. green ribbon.. something tells me we will see someone else with something similar.. wait a minute.. look at the ones just before this.. TAKEDA has it too!! (different side..)

Ishikawa is still laughing.. poor thing.. soooooooooo close..

Yay! It's Ishimaru!! btw.. how many people ARE they going to fit between the Audrey guy and Shingo? Eh.. I give up..

Not sure who wrote the letter but I am cracking up at the little doodle on the bottom right corner!

Sasuke 17 was the closest he's ever gotten to finishing!! (Sasuke 21 was friggin' EPIC and I still believe they took out the Flying Chute for him!)

Ishimaru Kenjiro 石丸謙二郎

.. OMG NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aww man he is looking PISSED right now.. To lose to the trampoline again.. oh that's heartbreaking!

He's so disgusted right now.. wow he's pissed..

Almost identical to Luci!

again.. almost identical to Luci...

just not enough height to spread out properly.. oh that sucks!

Doh he sounds sooooooo frustrated..

His voice is trembling he's so frustrated!

Fast forward time! Miho of Cherry Pie Death by Sextuple Steps

Not sure who that is but I recognize Paul ANTHONY Terek in the background! Mwahahhahaha

LOL they Fast forwarded a TBS announcer.. way to to TBS! Be happy kiddo! They could have cut you! Oh.. death by Log grip!

Issei Sakamoto (or Issei Daiki) - Talento - Death by Time up on Warp Wall

Yasuaki Yoshikawa 吉川泰昭 - Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル - Another death by Slider Jump for the MM members.. wow.. they are getting really far!

Tatsumi 龍美 - Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル - GEEZ another Death by Slider Jump.. and again.. another good result.. the MM members are getting very far into the course!

Masakatsu Izuma 猪妻正活 - Daisuke Miyazaki's Handball teamate - YET another pwnage by Slider Jump!

Nagano is not happy that only ONE person has passed this thing? Wait.. that's Shingo's legs... we dont' know if this was before or after.. losing track.. someone went to the G4 school of editing.. They seem to be announcing who's coming up of note.

Yay! Coming up next is the next All-Star, Shingo Yamamoto 山本進悟! Nagano and Takeda are there for support! Shingo's already praying...



Anonymous said...

Not sure if this came up on the forum, but the English narrator you're looking for is Dave Wittenberg.

The ironic part is that he does voices for anime.

Arsenette said...

LOL Thanks :) and yes I did know he was an anime actor. But like all true good ones - he follows the director's cues.. so it's not really Dave's fault.. I'd fire the director :p