Sasuke 22 - Spoilerific Review - Part 1

SASUKE 22!!

PART ONE

Sasuke spoilerific review ;) Warning.. incoming blog of Sasuke 22.. if you don’t want to know.. you have been warned :D For a preview of this event.. Please see SASUKE NAVI Spring 2009 (1 hour review of Sasuke 22 with fluff pieces of all the major players in the upcoming Sasuke!) Oh.. and as Ube says: If you are from the G4 Forums, DON'T POST THIS THERE.

UBE'S BLOG FOR SASUKE 22 IS HERE!

TBS 10 minute introduction before Sasuke 22 - 2100 competitors have tackled the course:
Toshihiro Takeda getting pwned by Stage 3 in Sasuke 21

Anyway.. I'll be doing this in chunks.. I had to redo all of my screencaps since the ones from KeyHole were ridiculously pathetic. I had KeyHole running since that was the fastest one (and almost identical to Japan time) and also had TVAnts going so I saw it in review 2 minutes later. Did not realize how much I would enjoy having BOTH on.. but again.. I"m getting ahead of myself.. so I'll do this Part 1 now and add them on one by one until it's all completed (Sasuke 21 was 9 parts when I finally finished). Thank you again to everyone for being so patient after my getting sick last year while doing the 21 blog. It's also made easier that so many more were able to see Sasuke 22 live as it happened! You have NO idea how happy I was to hear that! Thanks to the community for a great event and for everyone really enjoying the broadcast together. For the ones I chatted with during Navi and the ones I chatted with during Sasuke 22.. you know who you are.. it was a riot and I enjoyed this Sasuke experience more than any other!

TBS showing only 2 champions have emerged from Sasuke's 11 year run!
KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANE.. ehem.. Kane Kosugi from the epic Sasuke 8 Final in the rain (his last competition)

This year was a bit different. Usually TBS has a preview thing buried in the middle of the day where no one sees it. This year they added a 10 minute preview (more like 4 minutes because of all the commercials..) that had a synopsis of the past 11 years of Sasuke. They had black and white images of all the pwnage. The first shot was of Shingo Yamamoto on his back which was cool (not in a sadistic sort of way) but it was really well done. I started cutting pictures because the blog is already going to have a lot of pictures as it is. Either way.. there were a lot of great photos.. all dramatically in black and white to show the death by moments of many competitors including memorable ones from the more well known contestants throughout the past years.

Notice the full color! Kazuhiko Akiyama's win on October, 1999 (Sasuke 4)

They basically lead up to the only 2 competitors to come out of the black and white film. First was the very first champion (which happens to be my all-time favorite Sasuke competitor), Kazuhiko Akiyama 秋山 和彦 , a former hairy crab fisherman from a tiny village off of Hokkaido, Japan.

7 years later the second winner of Sasuke, Makoto Nagano, emerged on October, 2006 (Sasuke 17)

Second is the most famous because of his consistency by getting to the final 3 years in a row (Sasuke 11-13) then finally beating it in Sasuke 17 and of course being in the running a good portion of the time he's competed. Of course we are talking about Makoto Nagano 長野誠 - Everyone's favorite Fishing Captain Bada$$ of the Millennium. He fishes mackerel off the coast of Kagoshima, Japan for the company that he works for Takasui Corp.

The last competitor dropping from the sky, Makoto Nagano in Stage 3 of Sasuke 21

After the myriad of shots of everyone getting pwned past the Nagano victory in 2006 they move on to 2009 where they proceed to spoil everyone by showing who gets pwned where. For us geeks in our living room.. er.. uh.. computers.. we start taking mental notes..

Sasuke 22 build up.. Looks like they are pinning the Sasuke vets vs. the new kids on the block? (P.S. That's Toshihiro Takeda)

Every year it seems there's a theme. For 21 it was Japan vs everyone and their momma not Japanese.. LOL and they were happy to have more Japanese in the latter stages. This year it seems to be the year of the rookies. This section of the blog I cut because it's only a rehash of SASUKE NAVI Spring 2009.

Makoto Nagano staring into the camera :) What.. you think I wouldn't? oh nevermind.. carry on!!

Ehem.. yeah.. well in all actuality this interview and photo was not in Navi.. so what if he had 2 friggin' fluff pieces in Navi.. THIS IS MAKOTO NAGANO.. sheesh.. btw.. wtf is up with his fascination for crunchy orange hair??? I mean.. it's not even summer.. at least then you can blame it on the sun and salt water.. wtf is his excuse this time? Someone has to sit Asami down.. apparently her husband is not listening.. LOL He needs to be coerced... Seeing the Navi video.. I think she should have him whooped by now :)

Who is this climbing the tower? (See the tiny person going up near the top???) Yeah.. this is the first time I see TBS totally spoiling something this significant.. LOL!

The show officially starts with the wipe outs of Sasuke 22 in true spoiler fashion. Totally "ooooh" and "ahhhh" and then this image flashes and I go "hey wait.. I know that ponytail.." (P.S. I don't believe she had that hideous costume from 21 either.. she looked .. normal.. which is good.. I'm not knocking it! I guess I'll find out in June when G4 re-edits the show to make it look like they owned the place.. which of course couldn't be further from the truth... (digressing badly)

Note to the Olivia Munn Defense Brigade™ (LOL Rufus.. it stuck.. they call themselves that now).. don't blink.. this was AOTS host Olivia Munn's demise! This was shown with a bunch of fails in the opening of Sasuke 22 (shout out to David Campbell who's diligently cheering from the sidelines)

P.S. She failed at the second obstacle - Circle hammer.. so she did complete the sextuple steps! (ROFL Someone lost a bet... you know who you are..) Fair warning.. You will not see her again in the broadcast - they cut her run. You get glimpses here and there of her but not much was shown of her like they did with Sasuke 21 where she was everywhere and heard at all times. Note about the shot.. don't blink.. you would have missed it.. even I had a hard time getting a good shot of this it was that fast.

View from the SASUKE blimp of Stage 4 Final tower and some of the competitors

Okay now comes the really really long introduction to Sasuke 22. For those geeky.. there is a mantra the announcer is actually saying culminating with everyone showing. If I'm bored I might reedit this or make another entry.. in fact... if my brain is still in tact I will copy what it is in another post later on. It's the same one every year so it's not just for Sasuke 22.

Prerequisite shot of the yelling to start the show!

Okay this deserves it's own post.. LOL Let's psychoanalyze this! Front row Wakky, Makoto Nagano, Katsumi Yamada, Paul ANTHONY Terek, Toshiaki Kasuga from Audrey.. now back row.. Toshihiro Takeda, Kazuhiko Akiyama, WTF IS UP WITH SHINGO?? LMAO!!!!! ahahahhahaha Okay.. Shingo Yamamoto is there (shocking he didn't arrive late this time!) doing some goofy grin.. that's hysterical!! LOL he totally messed up the serious shot by looking away from the camera.. I was downright cackling when I saw this.. and dude.. his hair is long and wolfin'! Yeehaw.. OH! sorry.. last guy is Rugby player Tomoki Kitagawa.

Okay. ehem.. here we go :)

Lot of geeky overhead shots :) oooooooooh preeeeeetty :) They go through each obstacle and introduce the 2 new obstacles. New is the Circle Hammer inserted between the sextuple steps and the log grip (which they moved to the 3rd obstacle) and they replaced the flying chute with something called the Slider Jump. I'll explain it when someone gets to it.

TBS saying the first stage is 102 meters long

Number 1 - Tomoharu Shoji 庄司智春

Just as a fair warning I try to keep all names consistent (mostly to English.. First name is well. first.. and last name.. well.. last :p I do this to Asian names where usually their Family name is first).

Tomoharu is the first to get to the circle hammer...

Hmm.. doesn't seem to be the same as the Second stage Metal spin.. he takes a long time managing this thing. Not knowing what to do he jumps on it and just dangles off it.. FINALLY gets it to the point where his foot hits the squishy mat on the other side.

Tomoharu Shoji - Death by Log grip

Next is .. wait.. where is he? LOL apparently he's behind the sign.. must be some sort of military/special ops guy

Kei Yasuka - Ube has "Crazy Jietai guy!"

Death by Jumping Spider!

Bobby Ologun! ボビー・オロゴン (okay I wasn't losing my mind.. his brother Andy did Sasuke in the past)

Bobby Ologun - Death by Log Grip!

By now we know TBS is skipping people.. that's.. normal actually. We are now up to the 7th competitor

Pak Bo Kyung (maybe...not sure about that spelling there)! パク・ボキュン He's a Korean store owner in Roppongi that specializes in K-pop

Death by Sextuple steps

He has fans with signs! (He blogged about it and had the signs :D )

Looks like an impersonator for .. someone is there..

Naoki Iketani seems interested in this guy

Ooooh.. he's the impersonator that has Kane Kosugi in his repertoire

Takahiro Yamamoto 山本高広

Death by sextuple steps

Iketani having fun with him for failing.. that's .. normal too :p

His numbers are gold.. (Ube saying he did it to signify he is a champion already)

Ayako Inada 稲田亜矢子 from Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル

Wow it's been a while since they let the girls from MM compete! Notice that they didn't post her age.. LOL!

Aww.. death by Log Grip (at least she got to the end of the 3rd obstacle!)

Hori ホリ - another impersonator do his Takuya Kimura impression (dunno who that is either :P)

Yes that's him too (he took off his wig and coat) - death by Log Grip

Wow Digest already! Kazuhiro Manabe is a waiter

Waiter - death by Log Grip!

Mohammed Yone モハメド ヨネ - Noah Pro Wrestler

Death by Log Grip

Shibuya - taiko drummer (Ube didn't catch his name yet since it went so fast)

Stripping Drummer .. death by Log Grip

Kiyoshi Yano - OB/GYN (he ain't getting near ME with that needle..)

Death by Jumping Spider!

Takuya Kawahara 川原拓也 - Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル

Wow made it all the way to the new obstacle - Slider Jump but seems to have fallen off

First time of the day anyone has gotten to it.. so everyone was watching with bated breath. He usually gets pretty far though in the Sasuke's he's entered.. so you can imagine the regulars getting the first crack at this thing to see what he does with it. It's a weird obstacle.. seems like a marriage of the pipe slider, the bar from the new Salmon Ladder with the changed ends to prevent you from falling (i.e. from the stick slider) and you end up on the Jump Hang which used to be from the old days where you used to try to trampoline onto it.

As you can imagine.. a certain someone came out to see him..

Okay.. he jumped.. and.. what do you do from there?

You never have to see what happened.. Makoto Nagano is good in body language to know someone just got pwned spectacularly.. He never dissapoints LOL

Takeda on the other hand is either on pain medication or he knew he was going to get pwned.. dude never looks frazzled early on.. oh and he's chewing gum..

.. So.. Dude.. what'cha think of the new digs?

Looks easy.. eh? Just PUSH hard to keep the same momentum and keep the bars from movin'.. piece of cake..

Yeah yeah.. piece of cake... hmm I hope I got this covered..

(Reporter stars asking questions.. presumably "so what do you think of said new fangled invention?"..)

Aw geez I don't know.. I have to see more bodie parts thrown at it.. but I'm not so sure about it (LOL just kidding.. he said Nagano: "Kowai desu!" which means he was thought it was frightening...)

Speaking of bodies.. someone crotch is on display.. Someone pass the brain bleach please..

Comedian Yoshio Kojima 小島よしお

Doh.. death by log grip!

LOL he's trying to get back up the same ramp.. he apparently sets himself up to make it look as if he got bonked on the head and drops backwards in the water for the crowd

Wait a minute.. I saw this dance before.. He does seem familiar....

I KNEW I saw this before!!!! Thanks Ube!!

Digest time again.. sorta.. Chiro チロ of the Comedy team of Bigsmalln


Death by Sextuple steps!

Ayumu Kato 加藤 歩 from Zambugle ザブングル


He actually gets pretty far! He gets to the Half Pipe Attack when he starts to run out of gas! Here he is pausing to take a breath.. he had just falled down off the spider walk portion of the Jumping Spider!


He officially ran out of gas.. Death by Half Pipe Attack

Nagano loved it!

Wow.. Yamada.. smiling? Wtf...

.. anyone still have brain bleach?? Ube.. what is he doing to his face??

PART 2 HERE