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Sunday, January 3, 2010

Sasuke 24 - Spoilerific Review - Part 1

SASUKE 24!!

PART ONE

Sasuke spoilerific review ;) Warning.. incoming blog of Sasuke 24.. if you don’t want to know.. you have been warned :D (Just remember.. the USA Broadcast of this.. will be.. well.. WE DON'T KNOW.. Idiots haven't even shown Sasuke 23 in it's entirety yet.. and no date has been announced for the next Ninja Fest.. so Sasuke 24 might be in the Summer for all we know.. wtf... which of course delays the rest of the world's release to next year since they buy the G4 ridiculously edited and Americanized version of the same show... Anyway.. For a preview of this event.. Please see SASUKE NAVI FALL 2010 (1 hour review of Sasuke 24 with fluff pieces of all the major players in the upcoming Sasuke!) and the SASUKE PREVIEW SHOW that aired an hour before the official broadcast. Bare with me.. this show was 5 1/2 hour long (not including the specials..).. so if I suddenly die while blogging you know why .. LOL j/k Oh.. and as Ube says: If you are from the G4 Forums, DON'T POST THIS THERE. They expect everyone to stick their head in the sand and pretend it doesn't exist..

UBE'S Sorta-LIVE-BLOG FOR SASUKE 24 IS HERE!

(Massive thanks to Ube for his help on the names in English and Japanese of all the competitors!!)

Start of the show is a big moniker from Sasuke 23 - New Stars vs. All-Stars!!

Anyway.. I'll be doing this in chunks.. Thank you again to everyone for being so patient after my getting sick last year while doing the 21 blog. Thanks to the community for a great event and for everyone doing what they could to enjoy the broadcast together. There were approximately over 1000+ (conservative estimate) people watching Sasuke 24 live. We had 4 rooms (Livestream) averaging 30-40 people each (limit was 50) and thanks to a few fans willing to help stream paid service (WIST) and share that feed with the rest of the community. On KeyHole alone before the show even started was around 400+ watching and that number grew as the tourney kept going. This number doesn't even include the people who paid for subscriptions to online streaming programs like WIST and watched on their own. Also thanks to our friends in Taiwan who found 2 rooms in Justin TV showing an HQ copy of the tournament (that's what I was watching). The room I was in had 350 people while the other room had over 200.. I was also told that TVAnts possibly was showing TBS finally (though that part was not confirmed). I do hope it does show how much the online community has grown!!

Hitoshi Kanno 菅野仁志

Makoto Nagano 長野誠

They started out by showing the final of Sasuke 23 where the last representative of the "New Stars" died a painful death in the final Stage.. erm.. sorry getting in the moment here.. Anyway.. the last representative of the All-Stars was none other than Makoto Nagano. The final battle to win Sasuke has not finished so they have come up with a New Year's show to finally get a conclusion! New Stars.. or All-Stars.. WHO WILL REIGN SUPREME!! ALLEZ CUISINE!! Sorry.. again.. getting carried away again..

Sasuke 2010 GET IT ON!

Prerequisite pwnage material incoming

They go on to show a bunch of spoilers that were repeated in the various commercials and specials (Just go back and see them.. saving picture space as best I can!!)

Major spoilers are Yuuji Urushihara 漆原裕治 giving birth to kittens while making dogs wail with his high pitch scream..

Toshihiro Takeda 竹田敏浩 and Makoto Nagano 長野誠 having kittens of their own..

Someone getting utterly pwned by the 2nd stage Unstable Bridge アンステーブルブリッジ

and.. WTF.. did someone fall into the water .. from the Gliding Ring グライディングリング ????

ZOMG TBS SPOILING THAT THERE IS A FINAL!!!
Who will be the 3rd winner!?

Because everyone needs to sign in.. yo

Next were the prerequisite interviews of key players (seemed like the last possible rehash of Navi footage as if they were paying per click or something.. I mean seriously.. I saw it 3 times with this being the 4th.. If you want to watch it again.. you know where to look..

Mister Sasuke Katsumi Yamada 山田勝己
I'm going to do my best or I'll retire!!! No for real.. I'm serious this time.. I know I said it before.. no really.. I'm dead serious.. Dude I'm 44 now.. I'm serious I'll retire..

I want this flag.. dang it's blowing like hell.. Sasuke New Year's Day (er.. even though we taped December 8th.. but who's paying attention.. cough.. ) er.. uhm... 2010 .. GET IT ON!

2010 line up

More line up pics as the announcer drags on and on

Sasuke 2010 BRING IT!!

Raise your hand if you're SURE...

Okay this is a cool pic..

And look how tiny they look next to an over 75 foot tower.. LOL

WHOOT INCOMING FIRST STAGE!

Starting this long day is announcer Fumiyasu Satō 佐藤 文康 - the less annoying announcer..

Who will touch the red button this time!!

#1 is Nobuyuki Kishi 岸宣之 獅子舞師 - He's a Lion Dance Instructor

First obstacle is the same - 12 steps called Jyunidantobi 十二段跳び (for some inexplicable reason stupid G4 moronically called this obstacle 12 timbers..)

2nd obstacle is the X-bridge (basically a variation on the old Cross bridge)

Doh.. Nobuyuki Kishi 岸宣之 獅子舞師 Death by Log Grip ロッググリップ

Wow.. Akiyama (far right) is really blond..

Takashi Shiromizu 白水貴 消防団員 is a Firefighter.. he's balancing on a ladder held by 2 other men!

Doh but since he doesn't have orange pants.. Takashi Shiromizu 白水貴 - Death by 12 steps!

Jun Itoda 井戸田潤 of Speed Wagon スピードワゴン

Jun Itoda 井戸田潤 - Death by Log Grip!

Kyoichi Oosawa 大澤京一 酒の卸売り業 (Alcohol Wholesaler) breaking open a big vat of Sake!

We finally get to see 4th obstacle.. Jumping Spider ジャンピングスパイダー

Kyoichi Oosawa 大澤京一 - Death by Jumping Spider!

Mitsuo Nakatani 中谷充男 餅つき早打ち日本一 (Top Speed Mochi Maker) (the guy on the right is the one running)

Mitsuo Nakatani 中谷充男 - Death by 12 steps!

His fan club is depressed while Bunpei is cackling next to Akiyama and Kanno on the right is all hurt :p

Tetsuya Nakamoto 中本哲也 and Tomoyuki Ishizawa 石澤智幸 (Tetsu and Tomo テツandトモ) who apparently are singing a long song about Nagano falling into the water? (I assume.. since the video was showing that)

Tetsuya Nakamoto 中本哲也 (Tetsu and Tomo テツandトモ)

And.. the song was longer than his performance.. Tetsuya Nakamoto 中本哲也 - Death by 12 steps

Katsuhide Torisawa 鳥澤克秀 ウエートリフティング元日本代表 (Former Japan Weightlifting Representative)

We've seen him before in a few places.. we've seen him crush various fruit on the starting line .. but most remember him from Sportsman #1...

.. where he went face first INTO the Monster Box..

Take a drink.. Descente logo again :p ehem..

GERONIMO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Katsuhide Torisawa 鳥澤克秀 - Death by 12 steps.. and yes. he did go face first into the landing platform.. LOL

Ichiro Sugita 杉田一朗 空手家 (Karate player)

And.. he didn't break all the tiles.. doh..

And.. he didn't get all the steps either.. Ichiro Sugita 杉田一朗 - Death by 12 steps

TBS reminding us of the obvious.. if he broke all the tiles.. he might have had a chance :p

Katsuhiro Higo 肥後 克広 Jimon Terakado 寺門 ジモン and Ryuhei Ueshima 上島 竜兵 - comedy trio Dachou Club ダチョウ倶楽部

Jimon Terakado 寺門 ジモン - comedy trio Dachou Club ダチョウ倶楽部

Jimon Terakado 寺門 ジモン - Death by 12 Steps

Ryuhei Ueshima 上島 竜兵 - comedy trio Dachou Club ダチョウ倶楽部

LOL he doesn't even TOUCH the steps.. Ryuhei Ueshima 上島 竜兵 - Death by 12 steps.. so did he fail the opening platform?

Now.. this does look choreographed but it was funny.. Ryuhei Ueshima 上島 竜兵 - comedy trio Dachou Club ダチョウ倶楽部 falls into the water and he looks as if he's drowning.. his friends jump in to save him.. one of them hauls him out onto the dirt and starts to pump his chest.. and out comes water as if it's a pump while the announcer says "PING PING PING"

Udo Suzuki ウド 鈴木 from Kyain キャイ~ン and Akira Omori 大森晃 - Comedian Monkikki or Monkickey (モンキッキー) think this is the best gag ever!

Noriaki Kinoshita 木下典明 アメリカンフットボール選手 American Football Player

Noriaki Kinoshita 木下典明 - Death by Log Grip!

All-Stars Toshihiro Takeda 竹田敏浩 and Makoto Nagano 長野誠 having fun watching the fall..

Leave it to Takeda to mess with the fact that a football player has no arm strength to hang on to the Log grip :p

Time for the Comedy duo Audrey オードリー

Masayasu Wakabayashi 若林正恭 from the Comedy duo Audrey オードリー

Masayasu Wakabayashi 若林正恭 - Death by Log Grip!

Toshiaki Kasuga 春日 俊彰 from the Comedy duo Audrey オードリー (Sasuke 22)

Whoah he went too fast and lost control.. Toshiaki Kasuga 春日 俊彰 - Death by 12 Steps!

Dude.. I totally went further than you!

Tomomi Arimatsu 有松知美 - Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル - Kunoichi 8 Finalist

Yeah she's the one that unfortunately got disqualified in the Final

Tomomi Arimatsu 有松知美 - Death by Log Grip!

I'm happy she got facetime!

Rie Komiya 小宮理英 is soooooo not happy!

Someone pass me brain bleach.. it's the rose guy..... Eiko Kano 狩野英孝 I still can't believe TBS called him Mr. Narcissist..

Eiko Kano 狩野英孝 - Death by 12 Steps.. at least he got farther than last time.. AND was facing forward!

Eiko Kano 狩野英孝 covered in Septic Sludge.. (chuckles.....)

Fast Forward time! I like the cups :)

Jyunichi Onuma 大沼純一 漆塗り職人 (Lacquer Craftsman)

Jyunichi Onuma 大沼純一 - Death by 12 steps! (He jumped backwards after failing to land correctly onto the mat)

Yuuto Totani 戸谷勇斗 YOSAKOIソーラン敢闘賞受賞 (YOSAKOI Soran Courage Prize Winner)

Yuuto Totani 戸谷勇斗 - Death by 12 steps!

Gozealla Hisayama ゴジーラ久山 ものまね芸人 (Celebrity Impersonator)

Gozealla Hisayama ゴジーラ久山 - Death by 12 Steps!

Manabu Kishi 岸学 (Doki Doki Camp どきどききゃんぷ) Comedian (Doing his impersonation of Jack Bauer from 24)

Manabu Kishi 岸学 - Death by 12 Steps!

#44.. wtf.. oh ignore numbers early on..
Choshu Korikki 長州小力 - (G4 mentions him as the famous gut of Japan) - Comedian

Choshu Korikki 長州小力 - Death by 12 Steps!

Yoshio Kojima 小島よしお Comedian

Yoshio Kojima 小島よしお - Death by Log Grip!
(it's December 8th.. he must be FREEZING...)

Mitsuaki Tanaka 田中光明 '08全日本プッシュプルアプローラー優勝 ('08 All-Japan Push/Pull Roller Champion)

LOL He looks .. tired!! LOL

Mitsuaki Tanaka 田中光明 - Death by Log Grip!

TBS reminding us where he spent all of his energy...

Spinboy Aichi Oono 大野愛地 - Muscle Musical マッスルミュージカル

Spinboy Aichi Oono 大野愛地 - Right side up!

Spinboy Aichi Oono 大野愛地.. he makes the Jumping Spider.. then.. DROPS STRAIGHT DOWN! - Death by Jumping Spider

The Iketani bros shouldn't be laughing.. Rie is having kittens again

Youhei Uchino 内野洋平

Youhei Uchino 内野洋平 プロBMXライダー Pro BMX Rider

Sorry.. thought this was .. funny.. can we say no hope?

OUCH that looked like it hurt... Youhei Uchino 内野洋平 - Death by Jumping Spider

Genki Sudo 須藤元気 Former MMA Fighter (I couldn't get a clear picture of his face but he's been here before)

Genki Sudo 須藤元気 -Death by Log Grip!

Ryuusuke Itou 伊藤隆佑 TBSアナウンサー (TBS Announcer)

That's him on the right (I should hope so...)

Ryuusuke Itou 伊藤隆佑 - Death by Jumping Spider!

This is my even bigger vat of brain bleach moment of Sasuke 24..
Adamo-chan アダモちゃん (Real name is Toshiro Shimazaki 島崎俊郎) - Comedian

Adamo-chan アダモちゃん (Toshiro Shimazaki 島崎俊郎) - Death by.. yeah.. uhm.. 12 steps!

Is this a girl? Oh crap it's not..
Masahiro Inoue 井上正大 俳優 (Actor)

He's an actor..

Masahiro Inoue (Kamen Rider Decade) 井上正大

Masahiro Inoue 井上正大 - Death by Log Grip!

Oh.. that's a nice sculpture.. Me wants it precious!
Btw.. incoming Dynamic Trio of Death!!

For the love of everything holy.. SOMEONE FEED HIM!!
Creepy Model Maker Guy - Yasuo Aoki 青木保夫

Ack.. didn't even touch the first step..
Creepy Model Maker Guy - Yasuo Aoki 青木保夫 - Death by 12 steps.. platform..

I see hang glider has landed!

Hang Glider - Masami Harashima 原島雅美

Hang Glider - Masami Harashima 原島雅美 - Death by 12 Steps.. again..

Mr. Octopus (Tako Tencho) - Minoru Kuramochi 倉持稔

This time he had a real one and a fake one.. he has to wipe the crud off his hands.. so he uses his thighs.. ew..

.. there are no words...

After getting stuck a couple times on the steps.. Mr. Octopus (Tako Tencho) - Minoru Kuramochi 倉持稔 - Death by 12 Steps

Sachiyo Yamada 山田幸代 - Lacrosse player who made it to the 3rd Stage at Kunoichi 8

Doh.. she got stuck on the landing of the X-Bridge!

Only to die on the Log Grip anyway..

Sachiyo Yamada 山田幸代 - Death by Log Grip!

Katsuhiko Nagata 永田克彦 - Silver medal wrestler at the Sydney Olympics and is currently with New Japan Pro Wrestling. He's the younger brother of pro wrestler Yuji Nagata.

GERONIMO!!!!
Katsuhiko Nagata 永田克彦 - Death by Jumping Spider!

Fast Forward time Again!
Simonetta Kovacs-Takizawa 滝沢コバーチ・シモネッタ 主婦 (Housewife)

Simonetta Kovacs-Takizawa 滝沢コバーチ・シモネッタ - Death by 12 Steps!

Kazuhiro Oikawa 老川和宏 カステラ製造業 (Sponge Cake Maker)

Kazuhiro Oikawa 老川和宏 - Death by Log Grip!

Yoshinori Suzuki 鈴木由則 郵便局員 (Post Office Worker)

Yoshinori Suzuki 鈴木由則 - Death by 12 Steps!

Kazuma Sano 佐野和真 俳優 (Actor)

Kazuma Sano 佐野和真 - Death by Log Grip!

Hori ホリ - monomane specialist

Hori ホリ - Death by Log Grip!

3 comments:

Jelena said...

Excellent, as always. Looking forward to further posts!!!!

Arsenette said...

Aww thanks! Sorry I missed your post until now.. brain is utterly fried...

VenusHeadTrap said...

Idiots haven't even shown Sasuke 23 in its entirety XD dude that was really funny. and I can call you dude all I want.